The Coach's Corner

Leading by connection

The Coach’s Corner Newsletter #88

Having made a life-changing decision to move from Denver, CO to Rockwall, TX nearly six months ago, it is easy to understand why some people choose to stay right where they are and never relocate. I get it.

Moving demands a loosening of ties to people in every level of your life and work. I truly miss the ease of interaction with family, neighbors, friends and colleagues in Denver. Even with the option to remain close through calls and notes and visits, those relationships change.

There is good news. We are noticing an important grounding taking place here. One of our new neighbors joined us for dinner, bringing with them the most amazing smoked brisket on the planet. We’ll do that again. Farther down the street, another couple we met walking our dogs drove us to dinner and we discovered a shared love for 80s music. We’re meeting folks at museums, delighting in the beauty of the arboretum and making fast friends at a local landscaping nursery.

A sense of connection is taking place.

As a society, in our lives and through our professions, most of us long to feel a bond with those with whom we live and work. And the leaders who do it best understand the power of this tangible way of relating to others.

Whether you’re new in your role, moving up the ranks or you’ve been leading in your org for some time now – how you connect with others is one of the defining elements of your leadership.

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Friday, February 28th, 9am CT, for my free webinar: How do you show up?

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THIS WEEK’S INSIGHT

Leading by connection

After exploring how to lead with curiosity, I questioned how to communicate clearly. Now let’s bring connection into the mix.

When you lead by connection – you put relationships with your team as a top priority. As you get to know each person, you build trust. They know they’re an integral part of every effort, they feel heard, they may even share your vision.

This isn’t about being buddies. It’s about knowing the people with whom you work.

I recall the way my former KCBS Radio co-anchor, Al Hart, demonstrated connected leadership. Every Friday morning he would arrive with home baked Snickerdoodles. You wanted to be in relationship with him so that you got a cookie. All of us felt like he knew us. And he did. Talk about connected!

Here are three cues you’re a connected leader, thanks to the research from BerkeleyExecEd.

  1. A connected leader can recognize when their direct reports are frustrated or unhappy at work by taking note of subtle cues such as changes in body language or vocal tone—signals less-connected leaders often miss.
  2. Connected leaders are aware of their strengths and weaknesses. This makes them more capable of being vulnerable and allowing vulnerability in others.
  3. Connected leadership means holding each person accountable for their performance – not through fear or intimidation but through genuine connection and understanding of where the other person is coming from.

 

THIS WEEK’S TOOL

5 ways to connect with your team

As a leader, when you give your team the opportunity to be heard, offer a safe working environment and clearly set expectations – people want to follow your lead.

So here are five ways to be a connected leader. Thanks to BerkeleyExecEd.


My takeaway

Being a connected leader is one of the most amazing gifts you get to share with those around you.

When you think back to those leaders you’ve admired most, you often remember how they made you feel. It doesn’t mean every interaction was filled with positive feedback. In fact, some of my best lessons came from the tough interactions and constructive feedback sessions I encountered. Still, those leaders who connected best knew how to deliver tough messages. How to hold others accountable AND support them throughout their journeys.

The combination of curiosity, clear communication and connection are the benchmarks of the strongest leaders I know.

We all need people to love and respect, and we all need people who love and respect us.

Matthew Lieberman

Next week: 4 mistakes that block your leadership.

Save the date:

Friday, February 28th, 9am CT, for my free webinar: How do you show up?

 

Table of Contents

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